Hmmmm

You Are a Bow

You don't think of it as the holiday season - you think of it as the present season!

What Christmas Ornament Are You?

Seriously, I'm not all about the presents! This quiz is lying! LOL

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

One week later......

I'm afraid I have no drunken pole dancing pictures from last week's Christmas parties. My darling son gave me the gift that keeps on giving - the flu. I managed to make it through the dinner at Vaughn's party Friday night, but was home and in bed by 10:30pm, and didn't get out until Sunday evening - completely missing my party.

Do you know when your kids get sick, you wish you could take their pain? I actually didn't feel that way at all - I was more than willing to give the plague right back to the recipient. It's now infected Amy, so we've pretty much been a 'quarantine' house for quite awhile.

On a lighter note, Kare and I received a wonderful package from Nett yesterday! She sent me an ornament for the tree:

I totally laughed my ass off when I opened this. She also sent some other wonderful goodies:

Thanks so much, Nett! Kare and I really appreciated your thoughtfulness!







I have been checking the television for the past two weeks, trying to find out when "It's a Wonderful Life" was going to air - I watch it every Christmas Eve, but this year, I'm assuming that they've decided not to air it. I was in a panic....I'm talking major insanity panic. I actually told the kids yesterday that if I didn't see it by Sunday night, they would wake up Christmas morning to me burning all of the presents in the back yard. God Bless my husband - he went on a major hunt, and found it in the bottom of one of the clearance bins at WalMart. Bells rung and he earned his wings. So, we just finished watching it - Adam for the 1st time, and I cried like a baby.

I truly feel like I'm the richest person in town.

Tomorrow, I'm spending the day with my brother's family.....If I don't post before boxing day, have a Very Merry Christmas everyone! I hope Santa is good to all of you, and you enjoy the time spent with your family and friends.

Have a great weekend, everyone. Peace.

All is not calm....All is not bright....

Vaughn's Christmas party tonight....My Christmas party tomorrow night & Adam has been home with the plague all week. I sure hope he feels better soon - when he gets sick, it totally knocks him off his feet. He's just like Vaughn - when he gets sick, he has no appetite and therefore won't eat & loses weight. Somehow, nomatter how sick I am, my love for food always overcomes the illness.

I am just about finished my Christmas shopping - my goal is to be completely done by Sunday. I can't remember it ever taking me this long, but our house is being turned upside down between work, baking and a disease-ridden child. :o(

I have to go get a gallon of coffee before work - have a great day everyone - If we decide to go, I'll post pics of the parties. Peace.

Christmas Carols for the Phychologically Challenged.

So....Can anyone relate to these songs??? LOL

1) Schizophrenia---- Do You Hear What I Hear, the Voices, the Voices?

2) Amnesia-- I Don't Remember If I'll be Home for Christmas

3) Narcissistic-- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

4) Manic-- Deck The Halls And Walls And House And Lawn And Streets And Stores And Office And Town And Cars And Buses And Trucks And Trees And Fire Hydrants And...........

5) Multiple Personality Disorder----We Three Queens Disoriented Are

6) Paranoid---Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Us

7) Borderline Personality Disorder--- You Better Watch Out, You Better not Shout, I'm Gonna Cry, and I'll not Tell You Why

8) Full Personality Disorder--- Thoughts of Roasting You On an Open Fire

9) Obsessive Compulsive Disorder---Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

10) Agoraphobia---I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House

11) Senile Dementia---Walking In a Winter Wonderland Miles from My House in My Slippers and Robe

12) Oppositional Defiant Disorder---I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House

13) Social Anxiety Disorder---Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate

14) Attention Deficit Disorder--We Wish You......Hey Look!! It's Snowing!!!

The Ice Storm

Okay, since kare has been bugging me forever to do this blog, I figure I should probably do it.

I started figure skating probably around the age of 5 or 6. My brother was in hockey all of his life, so we pretty much spent a lot of our evenings and weekends at the rink.

I loved to skate. I loved the ice shows. I loved dressing up and performing. I lived for it. And then, around the time I was 13, I had gone as far as I could go in the small town we had lived in, so I started teaching the new kids, which meant everything to me.

My Dad was the typical 'hockey dad'. Even though my parents worked constantly, he was always at my brother's games, and going away quite often on his tournaments. It really wasn't that way with my skating. I know, it doesn't have the excitement of hockey, but I was usually dropped off and either driven home by another skating mom or in a cab. I can only remember them ever going to my year-end ice shows. But I didn't care. My parents had me enrolled in every extra-curricular activity known to man, but skating was the only thing I truly loved.

Skip ahead....We were doing the show based on the story 'Oliver!' when I was 13. I was skating as a market girl selling flowers. I loved it. I can still see the dress, and it was my favorite show ever. After the show, I overheard my mother talking to another skating mom who was complimenting my performance, and my Mom was saying, "Darlene will never be a real figure skater. She doesn't have the grace for it." That was the last time I put on a pair of skates for almost 23 years.

My girlfriend, Dena called me about 3-4 years ago because the skating club in town was offering adult lessons and she was wondering if I'd be interested. After long thought, I figured, why not? I purchased my 1st pair of skates since I was a kid, flew out on that ice and fell flat on my ass. I got up, and I fell. I got up again, and I fell again. But I continued to get up until I didn't fall anymore, and I loved it still.

We had a few people in our classes over the past years that had no clue whatsoever. At one point 2 years ago, one lady fell so hard, when she hit the ice and cracked her skull, you could feel the vibration throughout the entire arena.

Skip ahead to registration this September. Dena calls me to see if I'm still interested. Hell yeah, I'm still interested - Friday nights are the highlight of my week. I live to get out on the ice. But wait - there's a stipulation this year. Because of 'cracked skull lady' we have to wear helmets. Silence.

For about 20 minutes, I thought 'I can't do this. Geez, I can skate my ass off. I'm not wearing a stupid helmet'. And, to find the humor in it, we all joked about skating with the 'special' people while I wear a helmet and a bib. Then it stopped. I couldn't believe that a stupid helmet would be the one thing that would stop me from doing this.

So, I 'Pimped my Helmet' with enough bling to sink a ship, and thought I seriously couldn't look any more idiotic than everyone else out there. It gets me out there, with the ice under the blades. Helmet or not, it will always be my favorite thing to do. If I do lose my balance every once in awhile, I blame it on the extra weight on my head.

Am I any good? I'm not great, but I'm not bad considering I'm kind of an old lady now - LOL. I forgot everything, but it's all coming back. I'm even practicing the "Dutch Waltz" after Christmas. I can't wait.

I'll take some pictures of Darlene and the Amazing Technicolor Helmet at the next class. LOL

Have a great evening, everyone. Peace.

A Christmas Meme

I've been tagged by Netter! Here you go....


Attach a photo of one of your current holiday displays :

This was made for me years ago by a person I am no longer friends with - She could pretty much be the craziest, insane person I have ever met, with severe emotional issues. Too much baggage for me....But she's wicked at crafts. LOL

1. Egg Nog, Mulled Cider, or Hot Chocolate? Egg Nog Lattes

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just set them under the tree? It's all about the wrapping paper.

3. Do you decorate the outside of your home with lights? Any other displays? Just lights - anything else would get stolen by the hoodlums.

4. Poinsettias, Holly or Mistletoe? All three

5. When do you put up your decorations? Right around the beginning of December.

6. Do you prefer to give or receive? BOTH! I'm a total giver all year long, though. I celebrate everything.

7. Cut tree, live tree, artificial tree, or Festivus pole? While I absolutely love real trees, I have an artificial one - I did have a real one last year for the 1st time since I got married & it fell on the dog.

8. Have you ever made a gingerbread house? Yes, every year - they're kinda ugly, but it's fun with the kids.

9.Do you display a nativity scene? Yes.

10.When did you learn the truth about Santa? I was 6 or 7 and I saw my dad bringing the presents into the house after midnight mass. When I called him on it, he told me that I had to believe in Santa or I would never get presents again. So, I guess I kinda still believe in Santa.

11. Snow! Love it or dread it? I'm a total snow lover.

12. Can you ice skate? Yes - I actually take figure skating lessons every Friday night. Kare insists that I blog about it, so I will sometime.

13. Do you open your gifts on Christmas Eve or Christmas Morning? Christmas Morning

14. What is the most important thing about the holidays for you? Spending time with family and friends, and having time off work to play stupid games, eat lots & watch movies that Santa brought.

15. What is your favorite holiday cookie? Do you bake them or buy them? I love shortbread cookies, but I'm thinking just about any cookie that doesn't have peanuts or raisins (two things I despise).

16. What tops your tree? An Angel.

17. What is your favorite Christmas song? Tons! "Oh Holy Night" by Josh Grobin - Any Frank Sinatra or Andy Williams Christmas song, "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree" by Brenda Lee. I have my satellite radio set to channel 2 in my car - right after the American Thanksgiving it plays all Christmas music all the time. I'm in heaven.

19. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum? If Yum, how do you eat them? I can take them or leave them - unless they were made with chocolate or coffee somehow.

20. Do you send Christmas cards? If yes, do you enclose a letter or picture? I usually send cards and occasionally I'll send a pic of the family, but not often.

21. What kind of lights do you decorate your Christmas tree with? White lights, or another solid color, multi colored, candles, or a novelty light such as bubble lights? We were all about the white lights up until a few years ago - now I have multi colored seizure lights on the tree.

22. Favorite Christmas memory as a child? Tough question - I just had this conversation with my husband a few weeks ago. I honestly have to say my favorite memories started after I had the kids.

23. Best present that you have received? The good thing about me is that you don't have to spend alot (ignore my Santa letter) If I saw that you put thought into the present, it wouldn't matter if you spent $1 or $1000.

24.Turkey, Ham, Seafood, or Soup for your holiday dinner? We usually do Turkey and ham and all the trimmings - but boxing day leftover dinner & turkey salad sandwiches are my favorites. I hate all seafood except tuna salad and Captain Highliner fish sticks.

25. Favorite Christmas Movie. "It's a Wonderful Life" - I watch it every Christmas Eve and cry right through it.

26.Describe your favorite Christmas ornament. Aside from all the cute ornaments my kids have made me, my favorite is one a childhood friend gave me about 10 years ago. I've known her since I was 2, and we now live thousands of miles away from each other. I've only seen her twice in the past 24 years - the last time was just over 6 years ago. We always talk about how nice it would be to get together at one another's houses to just have coffee in our jammies and gossip. This ornament will forever remind me of the time I wish we had together:



Everyone else....you know the drill....do the meme and make me proud. LOL

Have a good day everyone.....Peace.

Amy's Excellent Adventure Pt. 1

Here's Amy at the airport on Tuesday, all ready for her trip to Ontario. I don't know what it is about that girl...Things happen wherever she goes. I just hang on for dear life and hope that I happen to be with her when this stuff happens....

Take Tuesday, for example...She was on the plane in Calgary, waiting to leave, but the plane was being held for one passenger who hadn't shown up yet. Amy has the patience of a rock, so she was pretty much growing more and more annoyed each second. The flight attendant finally closed all the overhead compartments, and they were ready to take off, and, wouldn't you know it, the guy finally showed up. He then proceeded to reopen all of the compartments and start to move everything around and shove his stuff up there. I think Amy was beginning to implode at this point and was muttering stuff under her breath (I'm assuming it was in the proper 'lady-like' language that I've taught her). The man turned around and looked at her. It was Bret 'The Hitman' Hart. Silence.
Okay, people - Let me tell you about Bret Hart. I love him. No, I don't like wrestling. I only love him. I have the Bret Hart Barbie next to my bed, I have his autobiography, and every interview and wrestling match he's ever competed in on DVD. I was asked once that if I could fulfill one fantasy what would it be. I immediately imagined my husband walking in the room wearing pink spandex pants, a black leather jacket, sunglasses, and have long sweaty hair, yelling, "The Best There Is, The Best There Was, The Best There Ever Will Be!" Somehow, it didn't do the same thing for me. Dont ask me what it is about him, people, but this man makes me blush.

So, back to the story.....Silence....Amy gasped. He sat down. The end. SHE DIDN'T EVEN GET A PICTURE OR ASK FOR HIS AUTOGRAPH. A part of me died. I have filed the papers to legally disown her and she has been written out of my will.

Have a great evening everyone. Peace.

Sorry, people - this struck me as very funny. Anyway, I'm getting ready for work, so I just wanted to add some humor to your weekend. :o)

Have a great day, everyone. Peace.

I've been Tagged!

Okay - I've been tagged by Brandy - here goes


Things You May Not Know About Me

Four jobs I’ve had in my life:
1. Cashier at a greasy restaurant
2. Secretary / Manager for various Hair & Body Salons
3. Telephone Solicitor for a Photography place (that's where I met kare when I was 15!)
4. Worked at a Health Food Store

Four movies I would (and/or do) watch over and over:
1. The Count of Monte Cristo
2. The Life of David Gale
3. Muriel's Wedding
4. Anything with Tom Hanks

Four places I have lived:
1. Newfoundland
2. Fort McMurray, Alberta
3. Calgary, Alberta for a few months
4. Spruce Grove, Alberta

Four TV shows I love (or would love) to watch:
1. CSI (only the original)
2. Brothers & Sisters
3. Grey's Anatomy
4. What About Brian

Four Places I have been on Vacation:
1. Las Vegas
2. Toronto
3. Vancouver, BC
4. Southern Alberta about 4 times a year

Four of my favorite foods:
1. Cereal
2. Nachos & Salsa
3. Mandarin Oranges
4. Coffee (yes, this is a food)

Four of my favorite books:
1. Any of the Harry Potter Books
2.Tuesdays with Morrie
3.The Five People you Meet in Heaven
4.A Million Little Pieces/My Friend Leonard

Four friends who I want to do this:

Anyone who reads this, consider yourself officially tagged.

Who Will it Be????

Okay boys and girls - I'm putting on a contest. Whoever posts the correct answer first wins!

I have six tattoos. With five of them, I soul-searched, studied and put a lot of thought into them. With one of them, I woke up one morning about 2 years ago, kind of in a pissy mood, and called the tattoo parlor and got it on an impulse.

Here's the thing. Amy's friend came over last night & noticed it for the 1st time. She asked me what it meant, and as as I began to tell her, my brain went blank. For the life of me, I could not remember what these symbols on the back of my neck were supposed to mean. I knew it had to have some kind of significance, but I was stumped. That's when it got funny for us...

Anyway, I woke up at 4am with a 'eureka!' moment. I remembered! The contest is - Would you know what it meant?

The first person to post the meaning of my tattoo wins! Bonus points if you can tell me what language it is. I'll give whoever it is my email address and they can send me their mailing address & the prize will be yours!

Here it is:

Good luck, everyone. Remember - you have to guess the meaning. The language is just extra.






Have a great evening, everyone. Peace.

Happy Trails

Amy leaves tomorrow for her trip to visit Benjamin. Be safe, little girl.

Well, I can't say it was the greatest anniversary in the past 17 years, but I can say that it was quite memorable....

The day started out like every other anniversary - opening presents, reminiscing about our wedding day, and marveling about the weather...It was 3c on the day we got married - it was -37c yesterday.

Vaughn got up and took Porkchop to her hairdresser appointment, and I stood in the shower until we ran out of hot water - here she is:


I was in a mood. I was so hormonal and emotional, I couldn't even stand to be around myself. I was suffering from the worse case of the "woe is me" sickness and I couldn't get one person to pack their bags to go on this pity trip with me. Vaughn was so excited about taking me to the honeymoon suite - so, I got some stuff together and we ventured out, all the while I just wanted to be home. I never saw the logic in him taking me to a hotel when we've got a perfectly good bed 5 miles away. I mean, if he had surprised me with a trip out of town, that probably would have been one thing, but being in a hotel so close to home, this close to Christmas just wasn't sitting right with me. So, as we pulled into the parking lot of the hotel, I just said, "I want to go home". So he pulled out of the parking lot. "Let me at least take you out for a nice dinner", he said. So, we did...All that mattered to me was we go to the lounge part so I could have a drink or three. You have no idea how bad my hormones were working - I was even starting to piss myself off.

So, we get seated at the lounge at my favorite restaurant, and I order a martini called "Hawaiian Headlock". I think I could have bypassed dinner all night & just drank these. wow - that's all I've got to say about those. So, we're eating our meal, and the man who was sitting in the booth behind Vaughn, but facing me, stretched out his arms and gave the loudest yawn...This in itself kinda made me giggle, but then he started to tip, and before you know it, he had gone rigid, dropped to the floor and went into a seizure. Every staff member in the lounge was running around like wet hens while this guy was throwing up like crazy, so I called 911....I happened to have my camera in my purse, and wanted to take pictures of him so badly, but Vaughn reminded me that it was probably in bad taste, so as we left, I did manage to take pictures of the ambulance.

This was way too exciting - seriously.

We came home & rented a movie to watch with Adam & it was great. I know I was probably a bit of a 'Debbie Downer', but all in all, it was pretty okay. On another note, my parents send me the wierdest bouquet:
When I opened it, I didn't even know what to say - they ordered them from a this wierd-ass interpretive floral shop, and I don't even know how to comment on them.

Our tree got put up - finally:


So, here it is, the day after our anniversary and I'm not feeling too bad - Tonight we have our 'Secret Santa' gift opening for work at a local pub, so, that should be fun....

Oh My God! I almost forgot! I found my new dishes! Kare, I guess this means that you'll soon have new dishes as well. :o)


I'm in love with them...Hopefully Santa reads this.

Have a great day, everyone. Peace.

Patriotism at its best

You are 100% Canuck!

You rock, you are an almighty Canadian through and through. You have proven your worthiness and have won the elite prize of living in a country as awesome as Canada. Yes I know other countries think they are better, but we let them have that cuz we know better than they do, eh?

How Canadian Are You?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Date night....

So, Vaughn & I went on a date tonight - First out for Chinese food, then off to the furniture store to raise some supreme shit about our phantom accent chair legs that somehow mysteriously disappeared....I was ready....I was pissed off....And then I walked by the beds....

I think I've told you how absolutely "normal" my husband is. He's the grown up in our blessed family....Probably the only one with any sense, actually - but I think with him being at one extreme and me being on the other, we are a good balance.... At least that's what I keep telling myself.

So, the beds in the furniture store were calling me to jump on them, to lay on them and to roll around on them....So I did - on every single one.. I think I may have actually dozed for a few minutes...The fun part of this evening is that I finally got Vaughn to get on the beds with me. Usually he's a "press down with your hands and sit on" type of guy, but he actually laid on them all & even saw the humor when I suggested we take a few for test drives before we settle on one.

The evening was fun - and very unnecessary as tomorrow is our 17th wedding anniversary, and he rented the honeymoon suite that we stayed in on our wedding night. How sweet is that????

Adam and I are going to put up the tree now - and Vaughn hasn't grinched-out once. Believe it or not, he's actually helping. I think this man's a keeper....I'll post pictures tomorrow....

Have a great evening, everyone. Peace.